How to Get a Toddler to Stay In Bed

After my last post about our toddler waking up and crawling in our bed every night, I decided something needed to be done.

We tried the sticker chart, which didn’t work for us.

We even tried to go the “If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em!” route and set up an air mattress for toddlers in our room so she would at least stay out of our bed.

That didn’t work either.

Finally, after I wrote that post, I thought to myself, “This is ridiculous! I have a bed set up for her in our room. We’ve tried all the gentle ways of getting her to stay in her bed all night, we just need to DO THIS.”

And by “this” I meant, locking our door at night.

We needed to lock the door so we could hear when she was up. She was sneaking in our bed without us even realizing it until the morning, so any efforts to get her to stay in her bed were lost.

How to Get a Toddler to Stay In Bed

I prepared her for the night we were going to lock our bedroom door. I told her we would be locking it, and that she needed to stay in her room, but if she needed us, she should knock on our door.

The first night was by far the worst. I read her a book, put her to sleep and, like clockwork, at 11 pm she woke up and came to our locked door.

She tried to open it, and then went back to her room and shut her door.

HOLY SMOKES! I thought. This was so easy! I should have done this a LONG time ago! She just went back to her room! What a smart girl!

Notsofast, mama.

She came back to the door and knocked.

I opened it. Picked her up. Put her back in bed, and walked back to our bedroom. No eye contact, no words, no cuddles, just back to bed.

She got up again. This time crying. I picked her up. Put her back in bed, and walked back to our bedroom. No eye contact, no words, no cuddles, just back to bed.

The third time she got up, she started making excuses. She wanted me to rub her back. She wanted me to cuddle. She wanted to come in our bed.

I picked her up. Put her back in bed, and walked back to our bedroom. No eye contact, no words, no cuddles, just back to bed.

The fourth time she got up, she came to our door, tried to open it… and then started to do her thing. I was watching her from under our door as best as I could. The hallway bathroom light went on, and it appeared she was in there… for a while. Then she came back to our door… and was silent. She went back to her room and shut the door.

I had no idea what she was doing. There could be toothpaste all over the walls, for I knew, so I went out to check out the scene. Her light was on, so I peeked under her door, and she was sitting on the floor, surrounded by books, sniffling and turning pages.

It broke my heart.

So I went back to my room, not feeling victorious, or like I had won, but I felt like I deflated the feelings of this little girl.

Shortly after I went back into my own room, she came back to our door knocking.

I picked her up. Put her back in bed, and walked back to our bedroom. No eye contact, no words, no cuddles, just back to bed.

Before I turned off her light, I noticed her lips were covered in lip gloss. Though I knew I was supposed to be stern, and consistent, I had to laugh.

Did We Get Our Toddler to Stay in Bed?

Sort of…It’s been about a week since we started locking our door at night. We haven’t had any freak outs like the first night. In fact, now she tells us, “If I get up, I’m just going to read my books.” She does still get up once a night or so. We hear her knocking, and it’s usually just because she has to use the bathroom. We help her, and put her back to bed.

But it’s nice not to have to share our bed with a squirmy toddler. And for now, it seems to be working just fine.

Tweet